5 Ways To Have A More Balanced Relationship!
6/25/2012 5:20:00 PM
1.) Take stock of the relationship: First of all, is it worth pursuing the relationship further? Maybe the reason the relationship is unbalanced is because you two have simply grown apart. That’s totally normal. But before you invest time and effort, make sure the relationship is worth working on and doesn’t feel forced.
2.) Be honest: If you want things to change, you have to talk to the other person about how you’re feeling. Yeah, it’s going to be a little awkward but you have to be totally open and allow the other person to do the same. Hiding your feelings only allows for resentment to grow and will make the relationship crumble.
3.) Be clear and specific: Don’t just say, “You don’t care about our friendship.” That’s a big statement and doesn’t help bring about change. Offer examples of why you feel this way instead. Like this: “It makes me feel like you don’t care about our friendship when we don’t hang out unless I text or call you first. I’d love it if you’d call me to set something up.” Okay, you don’t need to be that cheesy or formal, but you get the idea.
4.) Recognize the difference between malicious intent and miscommunication: There’s a big difference between a miscommunication and someone intentionally being hurtful. Sending dozens of text messages with no response? Hurtful and pretty rude. Upset because you’re always the one making plans? Maybe the other person doesn’t realize that you’re hurt when he/she doesn’t get in touch with you first because he/she is used to you always making the first move. The intent might be good, but there’s just a miscommunication. Figure that out before you jump to conclusions.
5.) Be willing to move on: Sometimes change isn’t possible. For whatever reason, that person may not be able to make the changes you need him/her to make. If this happens, think about whether the relationship is still worth it to you. If it is, accept it for what it is and don’t dwell on the things you can’t change. If not, move on and feel good about the fact that you expressed yourself (which is always intimidating).